What I plan on doing.

• Learn to knit.
• Feel less bad about eating unhealthy. I see people everywhere who aren’t happy about thier weight and want to lose weight and they seem miserable because they can’t eat the food they want. I have a decent metabolism right now. I don’t have any health problems. I already eat pretty healthy without really trying. I don’t have any reason to feel bad.
• Exercise consistently. I don’t want to get skinnier. I’ve had people say if I did that then I would be too skinny. I just want to exercise to stay the same size, but have more muscle instead of fat.
• Care a little less about others. That might sound kind of awful, but I really need to do this. I worry too much about making other people happy and then I end up doing something that I really don’t want to do. Unfortunately I haven’t found the balance of making everyone else and myself equally happy.
• Live someplace bike friendly. I hate driving and it’s healthier and better for the environment.
• Run in a marathon.

Police Department Internship Day 3

• Got there at 10am.
• Went into dispatch room.
• Guy I met on Tuesday (DG: dispatch guy) was in there.
• DG explained things to me.
• Sit in chair. Read blogs. Twitter. Play Audi A4 and Flood it on iPhone.
• Lunch at 1:30: Peanut butter and strawberry jelly and water. Thought of something I wanted to ask DU (detective/supervisor person). Thought I heard his voice while eating lunch. When I was done eating I went to his desk and he wasn’t there.
• Went back with dispatch.
• DU came to dispatch. Talked to him for a bit.
• Starting next week I will be with the detectives for the entire month of June.
• DU said I could leave early.
• Thought about walking home. Not that far, but I can’t remember if there are sidewalks the whole way going down the main road. There are.
• I think on days when I get off and it’s not late/dark I will walk home. If I do that then Yay! for sunshine and exercise!
• Have decided that tomorrow and Saturday I am going to bring a book. Maybe East of Eden. Probably. It’s my favorite.

Cute Shoes

Make me more likely to exercise.

I bought them a few years ago and when I told my boyfriend I wanted shoes he jokingly asked if I was going to get pink ones. I told him I wanted cute ones and he of course thought pink. (I do own a lot of pink things though.) I told him I was going to find pink shoes and these are what I found.

Show and Tell

How do people with boobs do this?

Since summer is coming I decided to do the 30 day shred. I have been doing it for a weekish. I did level one and it wasn’t very hard. Then I switched to level two. That one is more difficult. Now I have decided to do level two in the morning when I wake up and level one at night. I have done this for two days and I think this is going to be the schedule that I stick to while i’m at school.

My main motivation for doing it is because I want to look good in a bikini. Yes, I should be trying to be healthy and blagh blagh blagh, but honestly I just want to look good. One thing that I am doing when exercising is not wearing a lot of clothing when I do it. I have some shorts that I got for christmas a few years ago and they are pretty much the shortest shorts ever and I wear those and a sports bra when exercising.

One problem that I have is all the jumping type things. After the second or third day I decided to wear two bras. My boobs aren’t very big and it’s kind of annoying when i’m doing jumping jacks and the other exercises and they won’t stay still. Seriously, how do people that are larger than me do this? (And I just mean larger boobs.)

One reason I decided to do the 30 day shred is because it seemed like a lot of people on the internet were doing it and liked it. I bought it and like everyone else I really like it. It’s only 20 minutes so it’s easy to fit in and do. Also, since she is on the biggest loser another motivator for during the workout when I want to stop I think about all the people on the show who can do her stuff and that makes me not want to quit. I know that skinny doesn’t mean healthy, but if the people on that show can do stuff then so can I. Plus, some of those people lose somewhere close to what I weigh sometimes which is just crazy.

*I prefer the word boobs rather than breasts because I always feel like I sound funny when I say breasts. In elementary school I used to have a lisp and couldn’t say the letter s. Now I can say it, but when there is a word that ends in s-another letter-s I sounds wierd. In middle school I still would slip and sometimes say it funny and I had a friend with more than one s in her name and she always said I sounded like a little kid when I said her name because of the S’s.

Not my usual body complaint.

1. My clothes aren’t as tight as they usually are. Theyr’e loose.
2. I don’t see a difference in how I look.
3. The last time I weighed myself on a scale it said I gained weight.

So. According to 1 i’ve lost weight. According to 2 I have stayed the same weight. According to 3 I have gained weight. I’m okay with the first two, but I don’t really like that third one. I think i’m just not going to weigh myself. As long as I like how I look it shouldn’t matter what I actually weigh. Usually weighing myself just makes me depressed. I tend to like how I look and then I think “i’m going to weigh myself I bet I lost weight.” Ya that doesn’t happen. I usually am the same weight. I’ve started exercising kind of consistently. I decided to do the 30 day shred. I am determined to like how I look in a bikini this summer. Hopefully this helps.