The future I wanted.

Yesterday I was having a conversation with B. We were talking about like what our things that we would want in the future. Like what type of house, animals, cars, kids, and a bunch of stuff like that. He told me some of the things he wanted and then when he asked me I couldn’t really say anything. He thought it was kind of wierd that I couldn’t think of anything. Now that I am thinking about it more I think I figured it out. When I usually talk about the future stuff I was always talking with J. Everything that I have thought about has pretty much been specifically related to him. We decided on animal, house, wedding, lots of things. I didn’t really want to get married yet, but it was fun to talk about it and stuff. This whole not having a boyfriend thing though will be good eventually. Right now it still kind of sucks. Even though I kind of would like to just be distracted by going on dates with other guys, I don’t think i’m going to. It wouldn’t be very good and I don’t think it would make me feel better and i’m not sure it would be very good for whoever I went out with. Honestly rigt now talking to B on the phone is a pretty good distraction. He’s someone I can have awesome conversation with and i’m not dating him and he’s like awesome. This is like perfect. : )

*I think right now who cares about the future. I don’t need to get married, have kids, have a certain house/job or anything by the time i’m like 30. Also, It seems like everyone that I know is getting married after dating for like 2 years usually. I dated J for three years and even then I didn’t think I wanted to actually get engaged/married. It’s fine to not have boyfriend/husband and people who want to get married after dating for a short time well good for them.